Here or There

A bit of a different sort of post today. With just about a month left of classes (!!), I need to figure out my next move. Like literally, where will I MOVE?? For a bit, I was convinced that I wanted to go home after classes ended. I would go home, find a proper job, and work on my thesis. I wanted to go home. I missed my friends and family, but now that the date to leave is actually rapidly approaching, I’m not so sure. There are so many factors to consider so I am going to go on a little rant.

My visa is good until January 2018, giving me the right to live and work in the U.K. for the next nine months. While it seems like a long time, logistically it is really not. It’s not enough time to get a job that pays an actual salary in the field I went to graduate school for (who would hire a full-time employee for only nine months?). It’s not enough time for me to move into a flat of my own and make sure it has everything I need to live there (I’m thinking pots and pans, a kettle, silverware- everything I must leave behind when I move out of student housing). In theory, yes there is enough time for the last bit, but is it enough time that makes worth paying for everything worth it? Between rent and utilities and buying all of the things, it is going to add up real fast.

If I were to go home now, I could start setting up a life for the long haul. I can move back home to a fully-furnished house (and gratefully pay the measly rent my parents ask for), buy a car to replace the one I sold to move here, look for a proper PR job in Boston, spend the summer with my very best friends and family, and do the normal summer weekends in New Hampshire and afterwork drinks with friends. By living at home I can save up for my own apartment, somewhere I can live for more than six months. I was fortunate enough for my parent to have paid for my undergraduate degree in full. This time around though, it was up to me and because I didn’t already have any loans, I did not really want to start now. So, I sold my car to pay for housing and tuition and have been basically living off of my savings. It would be the most financially-responsible and grown-up thing to just go home.

BUT… London absolutely has my heart. This may very well be my last opportunity to ever live in the city that has become my home away from home. I cannot describe what draws me so fiercely to this city, but it’s there and it’s strong. Not to mention that London comes alive during the summer, meaning I would be leaving when it’s at its very best. I’ve made great friends here through my program who, for the most part, will all be staying until at least September. I could always get a job at a cafe or something along those lines, but is it worth it considering all of the money I have just spent to earn a degree? Also, will it make it even harder to leave in January after having set up a small (albeit temporary) life?

I am very conflicted and am running out of time. I scour the Internet everyday hoping to find an inexpensive enough flat that can justify my living here. Do I throw caution (and money) to the wind and make the most of it? Or do I go home?

Wishing more than anything that I could just live in the U.K. permanently, but as imaginary borders make it near impossible, I am trying to be realistic.

4 comments

  1. WOW! That is a tough one. Being your aunt I would love for you to come home. But I have watched you and followed you while you have been in England, you truly do love where you are. You are a smart women who has made wonderful choices in your life, you will make the next choice just as great. What every you choose know that I support your choice. ❤️

    Like

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